Get the spark back in your relationship

Get the spark back: update your sleep wardrobe!
Get the spark back: update your sleep wardrobe!

Life gets busy – jobs, children, family responsibilities and chores take up our time and attention. It becomes all too easy for us to compromise time with our beloved when we’re feeling exhausted from our everyday pressures. Before we know it, it can feel like that spark of romance from your early days has long been extinguished.

We can start to feel bored, dissatisfied and disheartened about our relationship. Maintaining energy and passion in your relationship in the same way you used to and making time to spend alone can often feel like a challenge that you simply don’t have time for. Of course, in all likelihood, there is still a lot of love in your relationship and you certainly can’t imagine life without your partner, but you wish that the zing and spark of excitement you once felt could be ignited once more.

Getting the spark back into your relationship won’t happen overnight, but it’s not hard to include small and simple things in your life that will likely make a huge difference to your relationship with your partner.

If you’ve been feeling like you need to reignite the flame of romance, then follow our tips below.

1. Set aside time for each other daily
Living together can turn your relationship into one of transactions – who is picking up the kids from school, who is going to soccer practice on Tuesday, who is taking the car to the garage, what to get from the grocery store… Residing under the same roof can mean that the time you spend together isn’t always quality. But instead of committing time to spend together outside of your home, consider how you can make time for each other daily even in small ways. It might mean putting away your smartphone for the evening, turning off the TV and sitting together in a space that gives you the opportunity to talk, share news of your day, and open up. Perhaps you could make it an evening ritual to sit on your balcony and enjoy a drink together once the kids have gone to bed. Or perhaps you head out for an evening stroll after dinner. Maybe you head to bed half an hour earlier and use the time to talk and enjoy each others company – no technology allowed. Making time for each other doesn’t have to mean expensive nights out or elaborate dates. Making the commitment to give each other undivided attention daily will have a huge impact on your relationship.

2. But there’s nothing wrong with a night out!
For many of us, going out for a night out or a weekend away is an indulgence that we can’t afford too often. But it’s also something that shouldn’t be treated just as a luxury – it’s also a necessity for a healthy and happy relationship. Whether it’s a meal at your favourite restaurant, a picnic at the beach or a romantic getaway, it’s important to regularly schedule in time that allows you to focus on each other in an environment where you are removed from the distractions of your daily life.

3. Do something different together
If you’re feeling a bored or that you and your partner have little in common, why not try something completely left-field together? Taking yourselves completely out of your comfort zone and experiencing something new together can bring you closer. Take an adventurous holiday, try a new sport or hobby or enrol in a class together. Breaking your routine can bring new energy and excitement into your life and your relationship.

4. Feel confident
Give yourself permission to spend a bit of time and money on yourself so you feel good on the inside, and radiate confidence on the outside. Head to the hairdressers for a new do, get your nails done, and do some online shopping to hunt out some deals for a new outfit. Looking sexy doesn’t have to mean dressing in a way that you don’t feel comfortable. Purchase some gorgeous lingerie to give yourself a boost and choose some flattering clothes that accentuate your figure without making you feel uncomfortable. You might not look quite like you did when you met your partner all those years ago, but when you’re confident in yourself, they’ll find you irresistible! When you’re a rushing mum or your career keeps you busy it can be easy to let your appearance slide down the priority list, but don’t feel bad about indulging a little time and care for yourself.

Relationships are always a two-way street. Being happy in yourself is the first step to being a great partner, so remember to focus on your own values and goals, as well as investing time and energy into your relationship.

Have you reignited a lack-lustre relationship? What tips can you share with others?